Back to school, back to school!!

Since Adele showed up just a week before our kids started school this year, I totally felt like I missed out on the beginning of school. I've ben playing catch-up since then! 

I just met the last of the kids teachers last week and finally got into volunteer in Nathan's classroom.  Luckily, they're all pretty independent this year and no one was traumatized by a new school year so I haven't had to worry about anyone having a meltdown with a new situation.  

Ava's in third grade this year and has Mrs. Way for homeroom, Mrs. Shankle for Language Arts, and Mrs. Gangel (or G - ANGEL as Ava kept telling me the first few weeks). She is in all the advanced classes and except for a few rough weeks of math, is doing great in everything. I think she's realized now that the math book really does have to come home everyday and that math homework really doesn't need to take an hour a night! 

By far, her favorite area is reading and writing and she brings home original poems and stories daily. She is at that "adoration" stage with a few of her teachers and makes little drawings and writings for them often. Most of them reciprocate and when I finally met them they raved about Ava and how they wished all students were just like her.  All my memories about school start in third grade so I really hope she has a great year to build good memories for the future. 

Nathan's in first grade this year and has gotten more used to the idea of school. He's still not in love with it and asks me every few days if I will homeschool him (I'm pretty sure that my kids think homeschool = doing nothing but I think they'd be sorely disappointed if they were to really figure it out).  

He has Mrs. Proper (Ava had her also and we loved her so much we requested her again!) for homeroom and got Star Student the second week of school. Again, I dropped the ball cause I thought the certificate was just something that everyone got until he started telling me (a week later) about how the little girl who got it the week before him got a new dress for being Star Student. John asked him if he wanted a new dress too but he settled on dinner at Pancho Villas instead. I was tempted to ask them if they'd gotten the wrong kid since he's so crazy at home but I've heard from his teachers what a model student he is while he's at school. I'm glad for them but wish he'd bring some of that "model" behavior home! 

He has Ms. Turpen for reading and is making huge progress there, thank goodness, since he was pretty much reading in kindergarten and then regressed, I think, during that year. He's in the highest reading group and just told me yesterday how he noticed that some of the other kids are reading harder books. Hum, I sense a little competitiveness here. Oh, and a touch of narcissism as he told the pediatrician that he's the fastest runner in 1st grade. 

How fun is it to have a local school and a dad who takes the time off work to walk you in the first day? I'd like to say this is just because I wasn't in walking shape but really, he'd do this for them even if I wasn't laid up with a new baby. I especially love this picture because I even know all the people in the background, which makes me feel like we're really integrated into the community. Yay! 

After checking out a few different preschools for Elias, we settled on Epiphany Catholic in Culpeper. Ava had gone there and it was a great family involved preschool, which is what I really like. Also, it offers a 2-day four year old program and, lets be honest, there's no way I'm getting Adele, me and Elias out the door more than 2 days a week! 

He started 2 weeks after the big kids and he was so excited to have his own bookbag. I was nervous that he'd be sad but he marched right in - after giving me a hug and kiss, of course. He's grown up so much over the past few months that he really isn't the baby anymore. Good thing, cause he really isn't anymore!  

He has Mrs. Terry (we practiced this name a ton the first few weeks since Perry the Platypus is one of his favorite cartoon characters and he was scared he was going to call her the wrong name) and Mrs. Watson as a helper. Every Tuesday and Thursday when I pick him up his book bag is bursting with his artwork. Painting is his favorite, followed by cutting and gluing and I'm told he's one of the best with scissors in the class. 

Lias is extremely detail oriented and will take 10 minutes to tell you anything. He has to fill in the color of shirt everyone was wearing and how exactly they moved ("and then the-ay went over to the garbage and threw thee paper a-way and then the-ay walked back to the chair and pulled it out and sat down and then the-ay….etc) all with hand motions and restarting if you dared to interrupt. It's endearing and exhausting all at the same time. I can say that today since he's on a 4 day trip to FL with John and I haven't had to tell him to "get moving or I'll light a fire under you!" at all in 2 days. Ah…..

He loves preschool and jumps out of bed each morning to ask me, "Is today a preschool day?" and "Which clothes should I wear today? Play or nice?". I'm so glad he loves it (Elias doesn't ever just like something - it's either he loves it or he doesn't) since there's a little bit of this going on over here lately. 

He absolutely loves her too, but sometimes a boy has had all he can take and wants his picture taken too! 

With all that school that leaves just me and this little pumpkin together for a few hours each week. I keep thinking I'll get something productive done but usually we just grocery shop or take naps in the car.  And that's ok with me cause it's just a few hours till everyone comes home and the craziness begins again. 

Adele's Birth

Disclaimer: This post is both super long and somewhat graphic so be forewarned! 

Feet. This birth story revolves around a pair of little feet. 

On Sunday night, August 5th, I was my usually grumpy, uncomfortable pregnant self. I remember ordering the kids around to get the house somewhat cleaned up before I went to bed since I had begged a bunch of girls from my church to come deep clean the next morning. 

My belly and chocolate ice cream about a week before delivery.

 All week I had been working on finishing the crib bumpers and owl blanket that I had been trying to make for months, even after a friend had come and done most of the work for me. I wanted to go to bed Sunday night but I remember thinking, "Just finish these stinking things so tomorrow we can put away the mess." Looking back now, maybe I was just nesting hard core. 

The cradle bumpers -with a month old Adele in them! 

I finally got up to bed around midnight and I was surprised to find John still awake watching a show. I remember asking him if the cameras were charged and bags packed cause we had a scheduled c-section on Wednesday morning and, technically, the baby could come early. None of my others were early and my actual due date wasn't until Saturday so I really wasn't feeling a huge sense of urgency yet. Yes, I know, I'm a massive procrastinator, even with getting ready for babies! With my second, Nathan, we ended up getting admitted to the hospital from a routine checkup. Of course, even though it was my due date, did I have a bag or anything ready? Nope. So the fact that I had most of my ducks in a row almost a week before this baby made me wonder why. Hum…. 

I went to bed finally around 12:30 and remember getting up at least twice to use the bathroom. Each time I had cramping and huge contractions, but nothing that any movement at 39 1/2 weeks doesn't usually cause. The third time I woke up about 4:00am  I felt something "squishy" down below so started feeling around, wondering if maybe, by a miracle, my water had broke. Nope, nothing wet so up I went to the bathroom again. However, when I sat down and gushed fluid, I got really suspicious. You'd think after doing this 3 times and all my studying I would have known, but I've never had my water break with any of the others until I'm almost pushing so this was a new sensation. As I got back into bed though, I had another huge gush and I knew for sure. 

I woke John up with, "Uh, I think my water just broke" and he jumped into action. After all my complaining about not being ready as we went to bed, he got ready fast. The plan all along had been to get to the hospital as fast as possible if my water broke since my last 2 babies had come in under 2 hours once labor started. I called Trinlie (the midwife) who headed out to meet us at the hospital and then called a friend to come watch the others. I was starting to shake by now and having a few good contractions, but definitely not the intense type that I normally have as soon as I go into labor. Honestly, I was still holding out for a home birth and somehow thinking, maybe she had flipped around during the night, even though I was pretty sure I had felt her kicking me down low during the night. I even joked with Trinlie on the phone about her coming to the house to check me instead of going to the hospital. 

But we finally did head out around 5am, after waking Ava up to tell her where we were going (she never did go back to sleep). We got to the hospital around 5:45am and met Trinlie at the front door, which didn't open until 6am. I remember just sitting there outside, trying to weakly convince John and Trinlie that maybe we didn't need to go inside and maybe the baby had flipped. I knew once we walked into the labor unit things would start happening fast and I just wasn't ready yet. After about 20 minutes (and soaking wet pants from leaking) they convinced me that, yes, we had to go inside so off we marched to the unit.  

Why do people even take delivery pictures? No one looks good at 4 am with only 3 hours of sleep.

Just like I thought, things got busy inside. I was happy to see all the nurses that I liked were working and everyone was super friendly, which put me right at ease. Literally, there were tons of people in and out of our room, filling out paperwork, asking questions, poking and prodding me but the one I really wanted to see was Dr. Bell and his ultrasound machine. None of the nurses had been able to feel a head when they checked me but they also hadn't felt feet so I still had a glimmer of hope about at least a vaginal birth. My contractions were still coming about every 7-8 minutes but they weren't anything I couldn't talk through. Dr. Bell finally arrived with his machine and as soon as he turned it on we could all see her head right under my ribs. I'd been really nervous that I'd breakdown crying right in the operating room, if it came to that, but I think I just kicked into clinical mode cause from then on I was firing hundreds of questions at them about the procedure. 

           

They prepped me and gowned up John and I filled out paperwork galore. The anethesthiologist came and joked "that this would be the most natural spinal ever" which made us all laugh. Trinlie and John were really reassuring and awesome at keeping me calm during the pre-op stuff. I got to meet each member of the team and most made some positive comment about my birthplan, which I was totally expecting to be laughed off the table (literally!). Finally, it was time to walk down to the room and I remember saying as I went, "Like a lamb to slaughter." I know that isn't fair or justified but one of the reasons (although a small one for me) in having a natural birth is to avoid a c-section and here I was having a totally planned one! It did help that everyone, midwives, doctors, nurse friends that are pro-natural, almost everybody, did not think that there were any other alternatives than having her by c-section. I just felt like I hadn't exhausted all my options but, deep down, I knew that I had so off I went. 

I'm straining to see the mirror, just off to the left. 

Once we were in the OR there was so much going on that I didn't have time to freak out. The spinal was, thank goodness, one of the easiest spinals I've witnessed (and I've seen quite a few need multiple pokes) so I was super grateful. It was really nice to actually know most of the people that were in the OR and be comfortable joking with them. At one point one of the anesthesiologist that I didn't know came up and pointed to the mirror and asked, "Why is this in here?" I quickly told him, "It's so I can watch!" and although I could tell he was not impressed, he didn't question me again. Dr. Bell did a great job talking to me as he went through the procedure and I could see quite a bit of it.  As they got down to pulling her out, I couldn't see because of the first assist's shoulder in the way. I tried to get him to move but things were happening to fast. Luckily, John got some cool pictures so I was able to check it out later.

As she came out - look for the little hand on the bottom of the picture!

Obviously, babies are extremely flexible because I have no idea how she is bending like this. 

I remember Dr. Bell held her up for me to see and all I could think was, "She's so TINY!!" I kept asking, what's wrong with her, she looks tiny!! She quickly started crying and pinked up nicely with APGARs of 9 and 9. I had asked that the receiving table be moved where I could see it so I was able to watch them wipe her down. One request I was adamant about was that they NOT wrap her up tightly and bring her to me. After waiting nine months, I wanted to count toes and look her over so I didn't want a little bundle with a face sticking out of it brought over. They were great about that and I got her goopy and messy, just the way I like them! 

I love, love, love babies hands. 

Definitely different from our other births but still amazing.

Total time from incision to her being in my arms was only 2 minutes, which is amazing for a c-section. Right after I got her, wiped her down and inspected her, the nurses asked me if I wanted to nurse her - right there on the O.R. table! Of course, I did so she spent 10 minutes nursing while I was getting stitched up. From the reports I got from the nurses afterwards, it is unheard of to be able to nurse in the O.R. during the surgery. I was extremely grateful for the staff that actually read my birth plan and made it happen. 

My awesome baby nurse, Sarah Powell, who is a lactation consultant and had Adele nursing within 10 minutes of being born!

I finally let them take her to get her weight and measurements - she was 7 lbs even and 18 3/4 inches long. Tiny, compared to my last 9.6 chunk of Elias but perfect in every aspect. 

Kangaroo care...or should we say hairy gorilla care? 

John and Adele headed back to my recovery room while Dr. Bell closed me up, taking out the 6 cm ovarian cyst that he happened to notice (it had been there since my first pregnancy with Ava). Earlier, he had also removed another small cyst while I was numb. Three surgeries for the price of one and yes, I'll take it! When I got back into the room I couldn't see Adele and quickly realized that was because John was cuddling her skin-to-skin instead of putting her in the warmer, just like our birth plan had asked. Adele's temperature was a little low (the O.R. is freezing) so Trinlie had John stick her under his shirt and that's how she stayed for the first 20 minutes. 

After she was warm I got to finally really inspect my baby and she was beautiful. Nine months of wondering makes you very curious just who this person inside is and it's nice to see them. She didn't look a thing like any of my other babies and she was so small I kept saying she reminded me of a premie. All the nurses kept pointing out that she was a normal size but I had made her out to be this huge chunker that couldn't physically turn around. Ha, not so. 

Soon after I got done checking her out, the kids arrived and all chaos broke loose!! 

I had imagined this serene and lovely experience of all the kids kissing and loving on Adele and it just did not happen.

Notice Nathan falling apart in the background…. 

Ava was completely enthralled, the boys were fighting, ice chips were all over the floor, kids were jumping onto my recovery bed and knocking into Adele, and John and I were exhausted from only 3 hours of sleep the night before. Oh, and my pain meds had worn off and I was in such pain I remember I couldn't even take a deep breath to tell them to calm down. Not fun times. 

In my mind I had invisioned us all giving her her first bath, inspecting her and enjoying the family bonding time. In reality, all the boys wanted to do was watch Netflix on my laptop and there was no way I could bathe a baby. At least Ava was way into helping with Adele and the nurse was super about letting her help with the bath. 

When we were planning the homebirth Ava had kept asking if she could cut the "un-ba-dill-ic-al" cord and this was one of the details I was so sad we would miss with the c-section. Dr. Bell suggested that he could just leave the cord long so she had the chance to trim it up and she loved it. I remember being the one to cut the cord for my little brother Steve when my mom had him at home almost 20 years ago. I'm glad Ava got the chance after all. 

During her bath John got quite a few nice pictures of her details.  Hookbeak nose (it's since straightened out!), tiny ears, rolls on her thighs, and those beautiful, delicate, wrinkled fingers. 

All in all, even though it didn't work out exactly how I had hoped it would, it was an amazing experience from start to finish. I felt like there were tiny little miracles all along the way, from the staff being so accommodating, to us getting to the hospital with plenty of time to spare, to her being totally healthy and fine, even after all our worrying about why she wouldn't turn. I can't say enough good things about Dr. Bell and his willingness to take me in at the very end, his reassurance that things would be fine, and his nonchalant, humble attitude that you just don't find in most doctors.

And, of course, Trinlie most of all let me sit on her couch for hours on end, giving me therapy sessions (which is what I always feel like I need during my mentally challenging pregnancies, much more than physical checkups). I absolutely loved every bit of the prenatal care I received and had so badly wanted to experience the calmness I knew Trinlie would have brought to the birth. Luckily, she was there through it all and really did an incredible job of keeping me emotionally whole. 

It was tough getting her here, but we're so glad that she's part of our family. Everyone absolutely loves her and she's quickly taken the role of spoiled baby in the family! 

And yes, we even kiss those little feet that gave us so much trouble!  

Adele's Pre-Birth Story

When I first found out I was pregnant, I knew right away I wanted to use a midwife, rather than go the traditional OB/GYN route. The whole reason I'd gone to nursing school was to start myself on the path to becoming a midwife so I knew that I wanted to experience the midwifery approach to prenatal care. Last summer I had been invited to attend a home-birth with a friend, so I had met and really liked the local midwife, Trinlie Wood. I called and made appointments with both the OB/GYN and the midwife, figuring I'd make a choice once we'd met both. After one visit with the OB/GYN, where I was only allowed to see the oh-so-unhelpful nurse that took a urine sample and confirmed that, "Congratulations, you are pregnant!" (Duh, this is my fourth time and I know the signs of pregnancy), we settled on the midwife. We weren't entirely comfortable with the idea of a homebirth since we live so far from the hospital but we thought we'd just see how we felt as the pregnancy went on, knowing that we could always just walk into the hospital in labor and be delivered.  

As the pregnancy went on both John and I felt more and more comfortable with Trinlie's ability and the decision to plan a home-birth. The kids got super into it, attended most of the prenatal visits and were super excited to "cut the end-ba-dill-ic-al cord." Some of my most vivid memories of childhood were when my last 3 siblings were born at home so I was hoping this birth would be a great experience for them also.  The pregnancy was uneventful (unless you count nursing school while puking and clinicals while hobbling with my hips issues) until around 32 weeks. A friend was visiting and as we were palpating the baby through my stomach, I felt her move almost 180 degrees. Sure enough, the next day when I noticed the hiccups they were now directly under my ribcage instead of low in my pelvis as they had been earlier. I brought it up with Trinlie at the next appointment and she confirmed that the baby was currently breech but we knew only 3-4% of babies end up breech at full term so we were confident that she'd flip back. 

In the meantime, I tried everything I could to encourage her to flip around - ice on the top of my stomach with a heating pad on the bottom, loud noises up where her head was (Nathan's screaming could make her jump, but that was about it), hanging upside down from the pool ladder, hip tilts with my bum up in the air and my chest down low (very uncomfortable with a big belly and pubic bone issues), and lots of rocking on all fours. Every once in awhile I'd think I'd feel her hiccup somewhere else or maybe move, but within a few hours I'd feel her head right under my ribcage again. 

Around 36 weeks we got serious about trying to move her. Trinlie doesn't do home-births with breech babies and neither John nor I were comfortable with trying it either. I knew from nursing school that quite a few of the local OB/GYNs would not be receptive to me coming to them at the end of my pregnancy because of the home-birth plans and I knew that with my history of fast labors I'd need a close hospital if that is what we ended up doing. Luckily, I had met most of the doctors with my clinicals and had a favorite from the start. I made an appointment with Dr. Jeffrey Bell and was extremely relieved when he told me he'd have no problem trying to turn the baby without me committing to his care for the delivery. We made an appointment for 37 weeks to try an external version, which is where they manually try to turn the baby by pushing on my stomach. This involved an IV, meds, continuous heart monitoring and 3 hours in the hospital with the possibility of an immediate c-section if something went wrong. Trinlie also tried a much gentler version of this at our house a few days before Dr. Bell with no luck in getting her to turn. Unfortunately, Dr. Bell wasn't able to get her to turn either and we had a quite a scare when her heart rate dipped down into the 50s during the procedure. It came right back up with a little oxygen but she stayed firmly under my ribs. 

The only other option left was a chiropractic maneuver so I drove 1.5 hours to have my hips adjusted to "give the baby more room to turn." But nope, that didn't help either so plans were made with Dr. Bell to schedule a c-section for 39 4/7ths weeks to avoid me going into labor. Although some breech babies can be born vaginally, it takes everything lining up just right to make it happen and most doctors, including all the local hospitals, won't attempt it.  I had at least 3 strikes against me - first, my history of fast labors, second, my history of big babies (Elias was 9.6lbs) and third (and most serious), the position of our baby - footling breech. Each time Trinlie or Dr. Bell would check me they would tell me they could actually feel her little feet, which is the least common type of breech and the most serious. Since there is nothing filling the birth canal except feet, the chance of a cord prolapse is high when your water breaks with a footling breech. So we scheduled the c-section for August 8th, hoping and praying that something would change and she would flip around before then. 

I know it isn't fair or rational, but I found myself frustrated and upset with the whole situation.  I had finally gotten my courage up for a home-birth, found an incredible midwife, gotten my kids all hyped for this baby to be born here at our home, and then, bam, nope, no go, not happening. I wanted that baby to flip and I wanted her to do it now!! After having 3 kids with not even as much as an IV, I was in denial the whole time about the c-section. It wasn't until the last 3 or 4 days before the birth that I got serious and put together my "birth plan." When I took it into show Dr. Bell he chuckled, since most people don't even think of birth plans normally and definitely not for a c-section. But he was a great sport and told me that everything there looked rational and he'd try his best to make it happen. Just for posterities sake, here it is: 

Birth Plan for Baby Genho

Dear All Hospital Staff at Fauquier,

Thanks for helping us help this wrong side up baby into the world! We know we are in good, competent hands and you all are very experienced at your jobs. We have chosen to come here for just this reason. This is our 4^th baby (all others have been born naturally without so much as an IV) so this surgery is a new experience for us. While we understand that things will be different because of the nature of the birth, we would love to recreate the peaceful atmosphere of our other births as much as possible. It’s with that understanding that we request the following during this birth. Thank you so much for helping us transition through this unexpected plan of events with patience and support.

Birth Wishes:

I wish to have my husband accompany me in the operating room at all times.

IV placed in forearm, not hand so I’ll have full mobility of hand after birth.

Warm blankets during surgery.

Catheter put in AFTER spinal.

Volume down on heart monitor beeping.

Own choice of music if possible during surgery.

Please keep my hands free and not strapped down.

Please lower the drape as the baby is born and provide a mirror so I can see procedure.

Please communicate with me and my husband about the procedures and update us a things are being completed (incisions, baby being born, closing up, etc – I’m using this as clinical experience!)

We request the option to take pictures as the baby is born.

Husband to announce Baby's gender.

Keep cord long for daughter to trim afterward in room.

If at all possible, please place the baby on my chest immediately after delivery while the incision is being closed.

Please delay all newborn procedures, including wiping down and cleaning the baby, until the baby and I have had some skin to skin contact and we have had a chance to get to know each other as a family. APGAR can be performed while the baby is with me.

If Baby is doing well medically, please bring Baby to me as soon as she is suctioned, weighed, and measured. Please do not worry about cleaning her up much before bringing her to me.

I would like to hold Baby (or husband hold baby) while Baby is being foot printed, getting bracelets on, and while the paperwork is being filled out.

No Eye Gel, No Hep. B vaccine or Vitamin K shot. I will sign the waiver ahead of time.

Please bring Baby within sight and close to me during measuring & weighing.

Please use double layer suturing for the incision closure.

Please no sedatives after birth. I want to remember my Baby's first day of life.

We do not consent to the baby being removed from my presence at any time. If the baby must go to the NICU or nursery, my husband, or another person we will assign, will accompany the baby at all times.

I would like to nurse the baby as soon as possible in recovery.

I am willing to be up and walking as soon as possible so I can get leg compressors off sooner.

Newborn Procedures:

We would like to give our baby its first bath as a family. Please direct us in this process at the hospital.

Our baby is to be exclusively breastfed.

We do not consent to giving the baby a pacifier, formula, glucose water or any form of supplemental food without our express knowledge and permission.

We prefer full rooming in, unless our baby is sick.

Please no visitors until we have indicated that we are ready (we would like for siblings to meet their sister before others do).

If baby’s temperature is lower than desired, I would like skin-to-skin contact vs. the incubator. 

So there we were, a week before the scheduled birth with nothing to do but wait and wonder if she'd turn. The suspense of a normal birth is bad enough, but this one about killed me with wondering not only if she would turn, but if we'd then get to have the home-birth we had planned if she turned or if it would go completely the other way and end up with the most medically complicated situation - a scheduled c-section.  All because of a pair of little feet… 

She's Here!!

Welcome, Adele Layne Genho, born on August 6, 2012. 7 petite lbs and 18 3/4 little inches and perfectly healthy, even though she wouldn't flip around.